These posts are for me. A library of videos I’m sharing with my boys. I’ll add here as I can find the time. “Moments of the past to give context to the present”.
History Lessons | Seneca Village
Mother’s Day
Nothing has solidified my role as mother more than single motherhood. The past year has been one of adjustment and growing pains; causing me to reach deeper within but also proving that the more I dig inward, the more I’ve been able to put out. Haha, “put out”. The other day Hooper and Van laid in bed with me, cuddled me, and told me so genuinely that they loved me. I know it because they say it but I truly know it because I feel it. I played Bob Dylan’s “make you feel my love” for them and let tears of gratitude roll down my cheeks. There’s nothing that has given my life more meaning than to raise my boys, to really evaluate what it means to love them — what it translates to. Love as a verb and not a noun, an action. An everyday sacrifice.
I haven’t thought about romantic love much at all since my divorce. My pull is toward myself; the more I see myself become whole, the more I see I’m able to give. And receive. I’m marrying me these days. Dating my boys. And letting the crumbs fall where they may, knowing that we are solid.
Hooper, Van, & Sonny — you three are my everything. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you, except for what you can do for yourself. Ain’t that what I always say?
Happy Mother’s Day to all the mamas out there. And especially to all the single mothers. I didn’t know until I knew, and man, the boat is always rocking but the anchor always holds. I see you.
Springville
I have this vision in my head that I replay often, especially on the hard days, where my boys – now grown men – are sitting around the dining room table reminiscing on that time mom did what she thought was best, owned her boundaries, and still provided, showed up, explored, and put in the time,…
The Bee & The Fox x Keds
Honored to share that collaboration I did with The Bee & The Fox and Keds is live. So nice to be recognized by Keds not only for the products we sell but also for the values we hold. Made sweeter by the fact I got to expose my boys to what it is I do…
The Chorus | Hope
I look back on the last few months in both a fog and with a clarity only the uncovering of your own truths can provide. So much to sift through, so much buried pain. To see is to feel and to feel is to own and they’re all so intertwined it can be confusing, disheartening, overwhelming. Emotions twisting and turning, the changing tides. Millions of footprints embedded in the sand, washed away with one crash of a wave. Chapters end and chapters begin. My vision for my future fractured, blood running cold, hard, dry. Like cracked dirt in a desolate desert. And yet there’s a quiet thumping through it all. A slow but steady stream of excitement; like when you’re climbing to the top of a roller coaster and you can’t see anything in front of you and you know that at some point the breaks are going to release. That you’ll be free. That the wind will again carry you. It’s an integration, I’ve learned — bits and pieces of opposites that make us whole. The fear and the excitement. The sorrow and the release.
Life is forever ending and beginning.